Don’t know how much more I can take

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    • #333236
      David the Gnome
      Participant
      • Total Posts: 2,604

      So, tomorrow is the fourth.  All week, one family member after another has been trying to convince me to go to the big family gathering.  I have repeatedly, patiently explained why I won’t.  My parents are almost seventy – and I will not risk it with the way things are now.  I still need them.

      I called my dad today because I was really upset about this nonsense at Mt. Rushmore, usually, he can help me calm down a bit.  Well, he had had a few drinks – and the first thing he says when I ask how he is doing is: “You’re coming tomorrow, right?”  I took a deep breath and explained why I wasn’t.  I told him I think big family gatherings are a bad idea right now.

      He told me no one there has it,  for sure, they only come into contact with each other – one of them in particular is a Trump supporter and doesn’t wear a mask.  Both of my parents worked for a hospital for forty years, one of the in-laws going is a nurse.

      They are smart people.  So how is it that they don’t fucking get it?  I am trying to protect them.  Maybe they dont want me to – but in that case, too fucking bad.

      As I watch this growing madness consume my Country and my state continues to be in the red (dangerous zone) for the spreading of this virus… They are so cavalier.  My neighbors are having gatherings, fire works in the middle of the God damn woods of northern Maine.  I see so many young people not wearing masks, or wearing them in a way that does not cover their nose – which defeats the purpose -.

      People are dying – and a lot more will in the days to come.

      So I guess i have to accept this burden of guilt from my whole God damn family on top of everything else – but as i observe the situation from this corner of the world….

      I am afraid.  I am angry at the idiots.  I am tired of having to patiently explain things to people that they already damn well know.

      Really struggling right now.

    • #333248
      mrdmk
      Participant
      • Total Posts: 1,847

      Just because everyone else is doing it does not mean it is a good idea.

      In the end, the only person who can look out for you is you.

      Do what you think is best and stick with it.

      If you cannot dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bullshit WC Fields

    • #333269
      Joe Shlabotnik
      Participant
      • Total Posts: 799

      just because they want it to be.  My elderly dad is impulsive as hell, and has been sulking because he’s been stuck at home for 3+ months.  He thinks the world is “back to normal”, and he’s missing out on all the consumerist fun.  He’s an idiot.

      ~ All good things are Wild and Free ~

    • #333283
      roody
      Participant
      • Total Posts: 415

      Families can really suck sometimes.

    • #333289
      ThouArtThat
      Participant
      • Total Posts: 3,270

      @davidthegnome

      Hi david,

      Stay strong and vigilant.  The celebration is but one day and a few hours at that.  The safety of your immediate family and self is much more valuable.

      TAT

      PS – a recent story to steady resolve – https://jackpineradicals.com/boards/topic/an-idiot-like-me-party-goer-shares-warning-before-dying-of-covid-19/

      Sooner or later we all sit down to a banquet of consequences.

      - Robert Louis Stevenson

      Politics is the entertainment division of the Military Industrial Complex.

      - Frank Zappa

    • #333304
      Fasttense
      Participant
      • Total Posts: 835

      The virus brings with it a whole lot of long lasting injuries we are just beginning to understand. You don’t need to have these problems. I still have clotting issues and exhaustion even after “recovering” over 4 weeks ago.

      I’m sorry to hear your family is not taking precautions. But if it is outside they will be safer. I hope they at least wear masks. It’s hard to understand why people voluntarily expose themselves to this.

      My 23 year old niece invited me to a get together at her new apartment. My brother, sister-in-law and my nephew are driving up from Florida for the party.

      I turned her down. She is now very angry with me. I think what they are doing is very dangerous considering how bad the infections are in Florida.

      Family can be very stubborn at times. They indulge in wishful thinking and want you to join in. If you join in, it validates their views. When you don’t join in, you remind them of the deadly disease spreading unchecked throughout the US.

      You don’t need this disease or the lingering medical problems it brings with it. You are doing the right thing. Stay strong.

       

    • #333309
      David the Gnome
      Participant
      • Total Posts: 2,604

      In large part because he is so overwhelmingly optimistic about everything – and I’d really prefer a world in which he was right.  At the end of our talk, he said he appreciated what I was trying to do.  Then he went on to say there would be a vaccine by January, that Biden was going to make things better – that the world is going to change for the better.  That our neck of the woods is definitely “safe”.

      I simply kept saying “I hope you are right.”  I tend to see the darker side of most things.  I tend more towards cynicism, my life experience is why.  I know how little empathy most of the world and society has when you really fuck up.  Or when you have more… “Issues” than the average bear.

      I believe I am making the right decision for the right reasons – but it still sucks.  I’d love to see my parents, my sisters, my nieces, even the in-laws, but… I would never forgive myself if I gave them this damn thing – especially when I know better, when I know enough to stay away for now.

    • #333348
      MizzGrizz
      Participant
      • Total Posts: 2,010

      ..and it doesn’t matter in the end what anyone else thinks.

      How are the members of your family going to feel if God forbid,the worst should happen to them?

      You could always get political on them and tell them you don’t celebrate the fourth anyway because it isn’t the same country it used to be.

    • #333362
      Ohio Barbarian
      Moderator
      • Total Posts: 14,587

      My whole family’s already had it. I’m an “essential worker” who has been working with the public every day since April(so is my stepdaughter who had it much worse than I and tested positive), and I’m not going to get the thing again. That would already have happened if it were going to.

      I live in a county that was an early hot spot. With any family gathering here, all of us would already have been exposed, with the exception of a couple of elderly relatives who wisely wouldn’t attend anyway, so it would not significantly increase the risk we live with every day. IOW, it would be routine.

      They’re finally starting to make masks or shields mandatory(forget the compulsive handwashing, it doesn’t do much good as this thing is spread almost only through the air), but that horse done left the barn months before the lockdown here.

      People here are far more concerned about losing incomes and housing than they are about catching a disease that most of them have either already had or been exposed to hundreds of times without ever getting sick. In comparison to homelessness or getting brutalized by the police, Covid is a minor concern. Life for essential workers in a metropolitan area is just different.

      It’s your choice. You must do what you think is best. You probably haven’t even been exposed, so if you don’t want to take the risk, any reasonable person should understand that. It’s no fun, I can tell you that. Annoying little bugger, the virus is.

      It is better to vote for what you want and not get it than to vote for what you don't want and get it.--Eugene Debs

      Show me a man that gets rich by being a politician, and I'll show you a crook.--Harry Truman

    • #333380
      MikeW285
      Participant
      • Total Posts: 242

      I think you’re making the right call.

      And we’ve told family that we’re not going to be doing our annual travel vacation to meet up with them and dear friends. The trip is half way across the country — so either a 2+ hour flight or 2 day drive. Not everyone is understanding of the call that we made, but we need to do what’s right for us.

    • #333384
      bazukhov
      Participant
      • Total Posts: 2,685

      Anonymous

      Tell me, great captain, how do the angels sleep when the devil leaves his porch light on? Tom Waites

    • #333388
      sonofspy777
      Participant
      • Total Posts: 5,157

      @ohiobarbarian Just out of curiosity. How many of “you” were actually tested? When were you tested? What exact test was administered?

      Early tests were not reliable.

      Were any of you hospitalized?

      Lots of people THINK they had it, but instead had a flu variant, not Covid-19.

       

      Bernie figured he could do more good ALIVE,
      than dead in a small plane "accident".
      I think he's right.

      Don't you?

    • #333405
      Ohio Barbarian
      Moderator
      • Total Posts: 14,587

      @sonofspy777 My stepdaughter did develop pneumonia, which is why they tested her, and that was in early March. And it wasn’t influenza. I’ve had real influenza, of both the swine and bird variety, and the symptoms were very different.

      In fact, they were very different from that of a typical common cold, as well. I’ve had dozens of those. That is how I know, and I don’t need a medical degree or a test to know it. Besides, if I didn’t have immunity to it, I would have gotten sick since then. Period. I’m an essential worker exposed to the public every day in a state where the public is not required to wear masks, remember?

      It is better to vote for what you want and not get it than to vote for what you don't want and get it.--Eugene Debs

      Show me a man that gets rich by being a politician, and I'll show you a crook.--Harry Truman

    • #333433
      sonofspy777
      Participant
      • Total Posts: 5,157

      Mercury still retrograde, actual intent cloaked by words. This was not an attack.


      @ohiobarbarian

      “That is how I know, and I don’t need a medical degree or a test to know it.

      Besides, if I didn’t have immunity to it, I would have gotten sick since then. Period.”

      Sorry that is just incorrect. I work in a state (I don’t live there) with no mask restrictions & with a major at risk population,

      for the past 6 months. In that time 6 people: 2 staff and 4 clients tested positive and were hospitalised. Finally REAL tests became

      available LAST MONTH. I met some of the guidelines for having the virus but I tested negative 2 weeks ago.

      Part of it is just plain chance…

       

       

      Bernie figured he could do more good ALIVE,
      than dead in a small plane "accident".
      I think he's right.

      Don't you?

    • #333439
      srobert
      Participant
      • Total Posts: 36

      People who have been exposed and are carrying anti-bodies may have some degree of immunity. But I’m not sure how much. I don’t even think the experts know. Could be you will get this again. Maybe if people develop some resistance to the virus across the population, the virus will be in an insufficiently fertile environment to grow. But I’d still rather not get it at all. Eventually this will pass, but I don’t think we’ve even reached the halftime of the pandemic game yet.

      Sorry about the OP’s relatives. When I was a kid I tried to get adults in my family to quit smoking. As a young adult, many of those same people said to me, “I wish I had listened to you”. Those people are all dead now.

    • #333475
      Earthartist
      Participant
      • Total Posts: 774

      David I think when you express your reason and concern it is making them uncomfortable. We see this all the time you are being responsible and they feel uncomfortable because on some level they know they are not being responsible. They are just being defensive; so what you are hearing is about them not you.
      This is a holiday I hate for a number of reasons but the biggest being my dogs and cats over the years have been terrified. Put it together with the bomb spangled banner and it just reminds me of empire and slaughter. So we have never celebrated the day.

      Ohio would you share with us what it was like to have it? I have been reading stuff about covid that I never knew, like extreme pain, soars and rashes what was it that made it so different from other flues?

      Earthartist

    • #333477
      Ohio Barbarian
      Moderator
      • Total Posts: 14,587

      @sonofspy777 That’s justbasic immunology when it comes to viruses. Your system, if healthy, will store the memory of how to neutralize the virus in T-cells, which kind of “sound the alarm” when they detect it again, and then you make antibodies quicker and kill it again; maybe without exhibiting any symptoms.

      No one knows all of the factors. Some will be genetic. So if you have the right genes, you’re lucky. You’re right, there is luck involved.

      In that case, since I’m an essential employee who has to go out there every gods-damned day, all I can do is wish myself continued luck, for I can change nothing else. I can’t just sit at home. Not and keep a roof over my family’s heads, I can’t.

      It is better to vote for what you want and not get it than to vote for what you don't want and get it.--Eugene Debs

      Show me a man that gets rich by being a politician, and I'll show you a crook.--Harry Truman

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