• New Registration

    To become a member of JackpineRadicals please see post https://jackpineradicals.com/boards/topic/new-members/

JackPine Elders

Home JackPine Elders

A question from a whippersnapper

  • Deadpool (12370 posts)
    Profile photo of Deadpool Admin

    A question from a whippersnapper

    Looking back, if you could change something in your past, would you change it or leave it be?

    Jan Boehmermann, Paper Roses, KauaiK and 1 otherso far from heaven like this

You must be logged in to reply to this topic.

▼ Hide Reply Index
18 replies
  • Totally Liberal Dem (1513 posts)
    Profile photo of Totally Liberal Dem Donor

    1. Change it.

    Not sure if it would be better…but I would still change it.

  • NV Wino (5911 posts)
    Profile photo of NV Wino Donor

    2. There are many things I've thought of changing

    I’m not sure they would make me happier, but they would have make me more financially secure.

    I followed my heart by going into design. I elected, on a couple of occasions, to stay an individual (hands on) designer rather than developing a company where I became a business person rather than a designer. I have mostly worked as an independent designer, which means I’ve always provided my own insurance and don’t have a retirement fund or pension.

    I elected to remain single with a single income rather than marry with two incomes (and two social securities).

    I never invested in a house or property, which would have given me additional security.

    I chose not to have children, who would have been a help in old age.

    In other words, I chose to go it alone, and I’m paying for it now.

    Don’t misunderstand me, I planned for the future. I had three distinct incomes set up that would carry me into old age. When Bush II moved into the White House, all of that—and I mean all of that—fell apart.

    Resist-sm_zpswfchkz8t “As we act, let us not become the evil that we deplore.” Barbara Lee  
  • tularetom (2311 posts)
    Profile photo of tularetom Donor

    3. I guess I'm just not that introspective

    Saying I would have done something differently implies that I’m disappointed in the way things have turned out for me.

    I’m 75 years old, in reasonably good health, I have nice and compatible family and a small but close circle of friends.  My needs are simple, I have a roof over my head and a moderate but secure source of future income and hopefully I’ll have a few assets to leave to my kids when I die.

    I suppose I could have married a supermodel and bought my own island in the Caribbean but I didn’t.  But realistically there was no fucking way that was ever going to happen, so why should I regret that it didn’t?

    I went home with a waitress the way I always do  How was I to know she was with the russians, too?
  • GoodWitch (956 posts)
    Profile photo of GoodWitch Donor

    4. I'd elect to be born to a non-dysfunctional family. nt

    Make America THINK again
  • NVBirdlady (3773 posts)
    Profile photo of NVBirdlady

    5. No changes. Everything happens for a reason. We just don't know it at the time.

    I have been married to the same person and lived in the same location for over 30 years. I had a successful career, and still considering another with a different focus. For example, when I didn’t receive a promotion as a young adult, it was personal to me then. However, several years later in hindsight, it was possibly not the right fit or another reason, and probably saved me heartache. Learned to move on quickly from these type of experiences that were not just job related.

    I have no regrets not having children. I’m very petite and the thought of childbirth frightened me. In light of global warming, it was a wise decision.

    President Trump. Thanks DNC, HRC, DWS. #StillSanders. #NoDAPL  #NoKXL Giant Meteor 2020
  • so far from heaven (14979 posts)
    Profile photo of So Far From Heaven Donor

    6. Ahhhhhh, grasshopper.

    You play a dangerous game. Very dangerous.

    I often play the what if game, but always come back to the present.

    Here is your dilemma:

    Suppose it were so that you could change one thing in your past. Not recent, but some distance back in time.

    You just lost everything that you cherish from then to the here and now, and you have no idea what the change will bring in return.

    Is it worth losing all that has been and is good to return and follow an undetermined path?

    I would never change my past. I would lose too much. Way way way too much.

    I accept who I am and what I’ve done and what I have and what has passed me by.

    "When you're in jail, a good friend will be trying to bail you out. A best friend will be in the cell next to you saying, 'Damn, that was fun.'" -Groucho Marx.
  • KauaiK (3529 posts)
    Profile photo of KauaiK Donor

    7. Whippersnapper? Jeez where did you dig that up? Hindsight is 20/20 is it not?

    I wouldn’t change anything because you LEARN from all of your experiences good and bad and GROW as a person.

    Having said that, the things I wish I would have learned to do sooner are:

    (1) don’t debate, talk or play with toxic people.  It’s not worth the effort or brain damage.  Walk away.

    (2) let things go; move on even if it means letting go of people in your life.  I’m old enough now to know and to have seen that what goes around comes around.  Karma is a bitch and will take care of whatever it is.

    (3) your career isn’t a life.  NO ONE lay on their death bed and said, geeez, I wish I would have spent more time at work.  TAKE the time to do the things and be with the people that bring you joy.

    You know the things you say you are going to do but then you get too busy with life and put it off or set benchmarks before you do this or that?  You should just do them.

    :heart:  :hug:


    Critical thinking is the vaccine for charlatans of the world who exploit ignorance - JPR's own So Far From Heaven.

    • NVBirdlady (3773 posts)
      Profile photo of NVBirdlady

      8. Agree with all three, very astute.

      When we are on our deathbed, nobody cares if we had perfect attendance at our job.

      President Trump. Thanks DNC, HRC, DWS. #StillSanders. #NoDAPL  #NoKXL Giant Meteor 2020
      • KauaiK (3529 posts)
        Profile photo of KauaiK Donor

        10. Ah, if we only knew then what we know now? Right?

        Critical thinking is the vaccine for charlatans of the world who exploit ignorance - JPR's own So Far From Heaven.

        • NVBirdlady (3773 posts)
          Profile photo of NVBirdlady

          12. Absolutely fucking yes.

          I once had an employee that wanted to fight every battle. I told him he needed to concentrate on the battles he could win and the ones that were most important. He was a Republican and wanted to fight everybody and everything. He would never walk away. He also had a bit of vengeance in him. None of it worked out for him. Choose your battles carefully.

          President Trump. Thanks DNC, HRC, DWS. #StillSanders. #NoDAPL  #NoKXL Giant Meteor 2020
  • bemildred (5856 posts)
    Profile photo of bemildred Donor

    9. Generally no.

    Mostly because I don’t know what to change really, you could make it worse. At least in this version of my life I’m still alive. But I’ve been pretty fortunate.

    It ain't the things you don't know that hurts you, it's the things you know that ain't so.
  • KauaiK (3529 posts)
    Profile photo of KauaiK Donor

    11. 2nd Response. Why are you thinking such deep thoughts at such a young age?

    Live your life; do the things and be with the peeps who bring you joy.  You’re not going to avoid the “bad” or “hard knocks” just because some old bat told you what she thinks in hindsight.

    You have to learn for yourself braddah.  It how you grow as a person.

    Critical thinking is the vaccine for charlatans of the world who exploit ignorance - JPR's own So Far From Heaven.

  • ConcernedCanuk (895 posts)
    Profile photo of ConcernedCanuk Donor

    13. I've pondered this off and on for awhile

    and decided

    leave it alone . . . 

    It was hell for awhile, but I stumbled through and landed nicely . . . .

    I don’t wanna go through it again.


    Why is it when we get older, we can remember the tiniest details from our youth, but not where we put our reading glasses 30 seconds ago?
    • glinda (2332 posts)
      Profile photo of glinda Donor

      14. You won't. That is the way it works if you have learned from it. At least that I


      I do not regret walking through all of the darkness that I have because it has taught me to come out the other side.

      Like @NV Wino, I have similar observations about my life. “I chose not to have children, who would have been a help in old age.

      In other words, I chose to go it alone, and I’m paying for it now.”

      My husband is in his 70’s with health issues and I am 62. I have no back up, no family and really no real friends to count on at the end. I am hoping to work on that but will be difficult I think.

      Everything that I have gone through has made me who I am and will save me time in the next round since I think I covered a lot of ground. lol.

      Animals know more than we do. - Native American proverb
  • misanthroptimist (759 posts)
    Profile photo of misanthroptimist

    15. Of course.

    I already know how my current past turned out. :)

    I’d change things one at a time until I got to this point again…and then change something else.

    Less facetiously, I wouldn’t change anything of import –maybe a drink or two less at a party or three over the years. I largely got away with doing whatever the hell I wanted to do whenever the hell I wanted. (I still do.) Why? I couldn’t tell you. Irritates hell outta those around me…sometimes irritates me, too.

    "We watched the tragedy unfold; We did as we were told; We bought and sold; It was the greatest show on Earth; But then it's over" -Roger Waters, Amused to Death
  • Jan Boehmermann (4455 posts)
    Profile photo of Jan Boehmermann Donor

    16. "……would you change it or leave it be?"

    Listen bub…… I tell you what……don’t cha know…….YES!  I would leave it be……. OR change it!  

    You can’t undo the past……..

    Just don’t repeat the same mistakes and expect a different outcome….. that’s the definition of insanity.


  • slipslidingaway (194 posts)
    Profile photo of slipslidingaway Donor

    17. I probably would pay more attention to the advice from my elders …

    they were not always wrong :)



  • Gallagher (535 posts)
    Profile photo of Gallagher Donor

    18. I would change it…

    I should have gone to college, and done something more productive with my life.